Duplicity
by Lightning and Ice
Summary: Pebbleheart and Suntail have one thing in common- they both witnessed Pebbleheart's sister's death. Now, moons have passed and they find themselves drawn together, despite the difficulties. Pebbleheart is running from the smothering pity of her clan, and Suntail from his clan's high expectations. But the comfort they find in each other may be more poison than cure.
1. great googly moogly its all gone to s

Sunkit woke up to quiet purring. By the sickly-sweet smell of early green-leaf, and by the large tongue raspingober the fur behind his ear, he knew it was Brightstar. His mother, the most respected cat in the clan.  
><em>Does that mean cats will kneel before me once I make my appearance outside? Will they bring my sister and I gifts? Will they make us co-leaders immediately?<br>_ Suntail shook his fur excitedly. He was going to see the outside today! His thoughts were merely wishful thinking.  
><em>It can't hurt to hope too much, right?<em>

"Swankit!" Sunkit hissed through his tiny teeth. "Swankit, wake up! Let's go outside! Let's go see the clan before anyone gets the chance to!"  
>Swankit, a beautiful cream-colored tabby, was clearly out of place. She was beautiful like her mother, and strong-willed like her father, Emberclaw. She was bright cream with stunning blue eyes, faulted only by one eye being covered with what looked to be milk. She couldn't see out of it, though she never complained. Their father, Emberclaw, was a fierce tortoiseshell with blazing amber eyes and a thirst for success. Their mother, Brightstar, a golden she cat with dark green eyes, got plenty of strange looks for Swankit.<p>

Sunkit couldn't figure out why cats looked at him weird when he said that Swankit was his sister. They were _exactly _alike. Plus, Brightstar had said they were siblings, so..

A golden tail wrapped around the both of them and a large muzzle pushed its way in between them. "Did you two plan on asking me?" Brightstar purred.

"Brightstar, can we go outside, please?" Swankit asked, dragging out the _please_ for emphasis.

"For ten minutes, you're still only babies." Brightstar replied, repressing a smile.  
>"We're not babies!" Suntail yipped as he followed Swankit out of the nursery.<p>

) () () () (

"Kits, you can go explore camp, just as long as you all go together," Mother mewed. She turned about in her nest, settling in for a nap.

Ripplekit leapt up, lunging for the nursery's exit. Just before she dashed out, she remembered to call out for Lilykit and me.

"Coming!" I squealed, taking off after her. As I neared my sister, I turned to glance at my other littermate.

Except she wasn't beside us. She hovered among the scraps of moss fallen from our nest.

"Come on, Lilykit," Ripplekit cried, "Let's go outside!"

Lilykit only shrunk farther back. "I don't think I want to. I'll just stay in here. "

I huffed. "Fine. We'll just go alone." Lilykit had been the last to open her eyes, the last to leave the nest, the last to try solid prey. I guess it made sense that she'd be the last to go outside, too.

"No, you won't," came Mother's sleepy reply, "You'll all go or you'll all stay inside. That's final." I stared beseechingly at Lilykit. She couldn't do this to us! We'd been wanting to go outside for _days_.

But Mother's words might as well have been huge boulders blocking us in the den. Even Ripplekit, the most rambunctious of my siblings, wouldn't disobey her. She wasn't just our mother, she was clan leader.

So we fidgeted. Ripplekit and I paced around the den, casting longing-filled glances at the opening, then flicking sad eyes at Lilykit.

Finally, after an eternity of silent begging, she conceded.

"Okay! I'll go. But only for a minute."

When she discovered the willow trees, the soft grass, and the kind cats, she was the last one to come inside.

!_!_!_!_!_!_!

I basically danced into the Stormclan with was was most likely the most obnoxious smirk on my face. I received plenty of rolling eyes glancing in my direction. Of course, _who cares, _ great Starclan, I'm an apprentice!  
>Brightstar walked up to me with obvious pride gleaming in her eyes.<p>

"I'm so proud of you," she meowed "Who would've thought a warrior would actually take you as their apprentice? I thought I would have had to kill you as a kit if you kept another kit up at night with all your gibberish." The sarcasm in her voice was too evident; I could feel her smile as she grazed the side of her muzzle against mine.  
>"'Sunpaw' is quite suiting, isn't it?" Now I'm smiling.<p>

"Swanpaw sounds better," Swanpaw challenged from behind me.  
>Swanpaw took up the role of the medicine cat's apprentice even before she was encouraged to do so.<br>_Encouraged? _ I grimmly thought. _The you're-half-blind-so-you'll-make-a-terrible-warrior kind of encouragement? Or did they play the "It's Starclan's will you become a medicine cat! They told me in a dream!" card?_

I tried to be happy for her, I mean, she seemed to be perfectly fine with her destiny. Brightstar seemed pleased with Swanpaw too, as she licked behind her ears, purring. I just couldn't shake this idea of this not truly being her destiny.

I heard a gasping coming from the far corner of the camp. One of the older she cats whispered something barely audible. I'm not completely sure, but I think she said  
>"My kits! They're coming!"<p>

The she cat that whispered this was Morningfrost, an older, but still beautiful warrior. Our clan's medicine cat rushed nudged Morningfrost towards the privacy of the nursery.  
>Swanpaw's eyes lit up as she raced to our medicine cat, Poolripple's side.<p>

"Poolripple, since I'm your apprentice now, can I please, please, please help you?" Swanpaw asked eagerly, slamming all of her words into one big, jumbled second.  
>Poolripple looked stressed enough with the unexpected arrival of kits, and Swankit popped her top.<br>"No, Swanpaw! This is your _first day_ as an apprentice, you're basically still a kit! Get a hold of yourself and do something useful- wait, I take that back, go take a nap, since that all you know how to do! Besides annoy me in the most unnecessary times, that is!" Poolripple snorted in anger and mumbled something about the "horrible changes" to Stormclan and walked in to help Morningfrost.  
>Swanpaw stood in shock with clear tears forming at the bottom corners of both eyes for what seemed like an eternity before bolting into the marshy forest.<p>

It took me a second to register what had just happened. I ran to the leaders den and quickly said something about leaving camp and then I ran as fast as I could looking for her. I felt bad about not telling Brightstar where I was going, but this was an emergency. I had to find my sister. I heard Brightstar spew some incomprehensible nonsense.  
>Maybe she was mad, but that doesn't matter at the moment. Swanpaw could've been crying for a savior to stop her from running away, or..<br>I sped away, trying to find her scent.

* * *

><p>When I found Swanpaw, she was looking at a tree across the gorge, or should I say, into Rainclan territory. I ran to her as I yelled her name.<p>

"Swanpaw! I was so worried! Brightstar's worried too, come home, the apprentice den will be pretty lonely without you; well, I miss you!" I meshed all of my semi-meaningless word into one big jumbled word and I bounded towards-and into- her.  
><em>WONDERFUL IDEA, YOU IDIOT! Okay let's go over your schedule. <em> _1. Find Swanpaw. Check._

_2. __**NEARLY KNOCK HER INTO THE GORGE. CHECK.  
><strong>_ I removed myself from my sister and I opened my jaws just i ncase I had to save her from the fast-moving water.  
>"You mousebrain!" She was upset, but safe. "You could've killed me!"<p>

_Hey, I could've killed me too! _I thought angrily. I took back my thought as quickly as I could, before I made myself embarrassed.  
>"At least you're dry!" I said stupidly.<br>She snorted in anger and prowled a few tail-lengths away from me. She made a loud _mrrow! _in anger to prove her point. I softened up, just for her.  
>"Hey," I meowed softly. "are you okay?"<br>"Well, I became an apprentice, I try to help since, you know, I'm a medicine cat. It's what I do, or supposed to do. I get yelled at by my mentor, I'm pretty sure she hates me now. Then I made a pawful of cats worry about me. Pretty fantastic day, how about you?" She mewed in despair. "Oh, and I almost get bombarded with an apprentice full of honey-gold hair who almost pushed me into the gorge."  
>With a fake laugh, I try to joke with her by saying "I prefer to think of as if I nearly <em>knocked<em> you into the gorge."  
>She smiled. <em>It's fake.<br>_ I flashed a genuine smile at her and nudged her _softly.  
><em> "Come on, the sun is setting. Let's make it back to camp before anyone worries we fell- we ran away." I stood up. I hope that sent a message to her saying that that's not really an option, more of a command.  
>"Okay." she murmured. With that, she stood up.<br>I smiled. _Things will now be looking up for us now, _I thought.

"Hey! What do you think you're doing!" yowled an unfamiliar voice from behind Swanpaw and I.  
><em>Of course not.<em>

I turned as slowly as I could towards the stranger. That could have been the worst or the best decision of my life. Two scenarios could have come out of it.  
>Scenario One: The loud stranger could be comforted by my hesitation <em>or..<em>

Scenario Two:The stranger could take the opportunity to attack or run while I was still turning in a one-eighty degree turn, as slow as I possibly could.  
>"Who are you? Do you belong to Stormclan? For Starclan's sake, turn around fully already!" yipped one of the cats, now in front of them. Not thinking quick enough, I meowed a yes back.<br>Then I saw them. There were three of them across the narrow gorge, all lean, well groomed, and all around beautiful cats. The oldest cat, which was the one that yowled at us first, was dark brown tabby with a few grey hairs poking out like dead nettles among blooming ones. He had a long body with stripes going down him from neck to tail. His stripes were tinted nearly the same color as the rest of him in the red sunset colors bursting from the sky and through the slowly reddening trees.  
><em>He's loud, <em>I thought.

The next cat he saw was also male, but a sleek brown. He'd clearly been swimming. He was pacing, trying to prove that he was irritated.  
>"You're annoying me more tha I'm annoying you," I murmured to Swanpaw. She snickered.<br>I could hear him from across the gorge. "Just some young Stormclan scum, let's just go!" Elder Brownie did some inaudible chiding.  
>The next cat was a less liquid-infested, and more of a shiny grey-blue. She was about the same age as Swanpaw and I.<br>"Back away from the gorge, you might fall in! I'm pretty sure none of us want to save your tree-climbing butts!" Brownbutt gave her a disapproving look.

Swanpaw mimicked what the Blue Belle had said in a shrill voice; I smiled, it was only kind of funny.

"What are you doing so close? You could literally _die_," Big Brown yelled to us. I wanted to yell something like "_I was coming after my sister you monstrosity. And yes, I do have a sense of my own mortality!" _I kept to "Okay, we're leaving anyway!" I sped into the near darkness with Swanpaw right on my tail.

) () () () (

Some days I trained alone. Some days I trained with Lilypaw. Some days I even trained with Thornpaw, Hollypaw or Dapplepaw. My favorite days, though, were when I trained with Ripplepaw.

Lilypaw, while not as shy as she was as a kit, still shied away from nearly everything exciting. I still remember walking up to her a moon ago, after watching her beg her mentor not to make her spar with Hollypaw.

"If you hate fighting so much," I drawled, " maybe you should just hurry up and be a medicine cat. No point wasting time."

I meant it as a tease, like the barbs I threw at Ripplepaw daily, but it came out cruel-sounding.

Her eyes widened, and Mother appeared almost instantaneously, condemning me to a quarter-moon of cleaning the elder's den.

I'd since apologized, and she said she forgave me, but she never stopped being sensitive.

Hollypaw and Dapplepaw only came to train when my mentor decided I needed a challenge. Even though they were only a few moons my senior, those few moons were extra tricks they could use to outsmart me. If they bothered to stop being better than me, it only lasted until a mentor noticed and reminded them to give their all.

The only fair fights I got were against Ripplepaw. Our blows against each other stung true and sharp, but purrs chased away any pain. We watched each other's backs, and if we fought as a team we never lost, even against Hollypaw and Dapplepaw.

When it came time for the most daunting part of training- having the ancient battle moves, the most secret and dangerous ones done to us to teach restraint in using them- we did it together. The half-moon spent learning about what places to strike would cause pain or even temporary paralysis had been intriguing, but there had always been the fearful undercurrent of _this will happen to me soon._

Lichenclaw, my mentor, stepped up to me, and I extended my forepaw. This was the blow used most often as a demonstration, as there was the least chance of damaging anything

I closed my eyes as he murmured an apology.

The blow sent me sprawling, clutching my leg to my chest as my eyes watered. I barely noticed Ripplepaw thudding to the ground.

"Are they okay? I don't remember it hurting quite that much," Lichenclaw muttered towards Blossomflight.

"I could hit you with a rock and you wouldn't feel it, Lichenclaw. They're strong, they'll be fine."

!_!_!_!_!_!

My training days basically flashed before my eyes. I trained with female warrior, Foxfeet. The amount of tolerance practically radiating from her was phenomenal. Swanpaw, of course, trained with Poolripple. Poolripple spent a whole moon apologizing to Swanpaw for snapping at her, but that didn't keep Swanpaw from cowering everytime Poolripple spoke to her.

I couldn't thank Starclan enough when I found out that Swanpaw and I would be awarded our warrior and medicine cat names on the same day. I basically zoomed around Stormclan yowling it, and Swanpaw sat outside the medicine cat den smiling. The annoying apprentice Pinepaw kept pushing her muzzle into my shoulder telling me how happy she was for me. Her two other sisters looked at us and rolled their eyes.  
>"<em>Let all cats old enough to catch their own prey gather here beneath the Silverrock<em> _for a Clan meeting" _yowled on oh-so familiar voice.

_Oh Starclan yes!  
><em> I pushed my way to the front because I _can _catch my own prey and _THIS IS IT!_

Brightstar radiated pride and happiness. "I now ask the two apprentices as follows to join me on the Silverrock: Sunpaw and Swanpaw."

The mousebrain Pinepaw gave me an encouraging "Good luck!" as I climbed the rock. As if I needed luck. Swanpaw and I nearly made it to the top at the same time.

"These two apprentices have worked six moons in the minor famine of leaf-fall and they have shown themselves worthy. Foxfeet, Poolripple, have these two fulfilled their duties as apprentices, and are they ready to become a warrior and medicine cat?"  
>They nodded in unison.<br>This wasn't exactly traditional. Swanpaw was technically already a full-fledged medicine, and I'd heard rumors she already has her name. My theory is that Poolripple insisted she officially receive her name from her own mother. I'd shrugged the topic off many times.  
>"Then by the powers of Starclan," Brightstar continued "Sunpaw, you will now be know as Suntail. Starclan honors your strength and your endurance, may Starclan light your path." Brightstar put her muzzle on my head and purred. I could feel her resisting the urge to either lick behind my ears or yowl something along the lines of "<em>SUNTAIL ONLY HAD TO RID THE ELDERS OF TICKS TWENTY-TWO TIMES! TWENTY-TWO!"<br>_ I stepped back and made a pathway for Swanpaw to step forward.

"Swanpaw," Brightstar said, with a warm smile on her face. Swanpaw stepped forward. "By the power of Starclan, you will now be known as Swansong, a full medicine cat. Starclan honors your sacrifice and courage. May Starclan light your path."

_Sacrifice?_

Brightstar did the same to her only daughter and backed away. The crowd began chanting our names like they were surprised we made it this far.

_Suntail! Swansong! Suntail! Swansong!_

Things will be looking up for us now.

) () () () (

On our last night as apprentices, Lilypaw refused to follow us out of camp.

Honestly, it was frustrating. Mother had been pushing Ripplepaw and I to include our sister more, and now that we tried, she wouldn't come.

"We'll need sleep so we can sit vigil tomorrow!" She protested. Ripplepaw rolled her eyes, and let out an impatient snort.

"Fine," I mewed, "Come find us if you change your mind."

Rainclan's camp had no physical boundaries, just trees and boulders. I loved it. If nothing else, it made it easier to sneak out, to get to the blackberry thickets on the border. Only Branchfoot, the medicine cat, came out to them because blackberries aren't worth eating and thorns hurt.

Two things I learned from experience. The first time we came here, in the dead of summer, Ripplepaw dared me to taste one of the shining berries. The hot juice had exploded sour, making me run to gulp down water, and staining my muzzle purple. The thorns bit at us whenever we came, and there was just no way around it.

We sat between bushes,gazing at everything and nothing. I had planned to share my gossip, that one of Honeygaze's kits, Thornpaw's little brother, has a crush on one of us. But it didn't seem like the time to say it. Ripplepaw had lapsed into a tense silence, and I mimicked her without thinking.

"Pebblepaw, " She mewed suddenly, "I'm worried about tomorrow."

"I'm a bit nervous too. What if we get stupid names?"

"That's not the problem," She spat. I flinched back a bit.

"Besides," She mewed, taking a softer tone, "You know Mother picks good names. I'm worried that once we become warriors, nothing will ever change."

"Is that a bad thing?" I asked, more than a bit confused. I had never wondered if warrior duties were anything but another adventure, but it was something to think about. And something about seeing Ripplepaw like this, scared and wild-eyed, set me off. She was always the perfect example of fearless confidence, but not she looked paranoid. Usure.

"It is! Do you want to fall into a rut? Look at the warriors. Look at _Mother. _They wake up, patrol, hunt, eat, and go to sleep. The most exciting thing that happens are kits, and all they do is raise them for a life of the exact. Same. Thing. I can't do that. I _won't _do that."

She breathed heavily, looking around like the thorns were seconds away from tearing into her pelt.

I just wanted it to stop. This was supposed to be a night of fun, but now Ripplepaw was panicking and I was re-evaluating everything I'd looked forward to.

"Look," I mewed, and she did. "I promise we won't be like that. We'll change our own destiny, if we have to."

She seemed to calm a bit, look more like I was used to. Alert, slightly excited.

"You think we can?"

"I _know_. We won't be like the rest of them. We'll be the most outstanding warriors the clans have ever seen."

* * *

><p>Mother did pick good names. Pebbleheart sounded strong, but not stubborn. One of the elders once said that enough pebbles can divert any stream. It was nice to think Mother had that in mind when she picked my name out.<p>

Ripplebreeze liked her name. She was pretty quick, both in her actual speed and her wit, Breeze was a great name for her

Lilystorm's name confused me a bit. Storm conjured up images of a great warrior who whirled into battle, with claws of lightning and blows like thunder. Not a timid she cat who hardly ever unsheathed her claws.

By then I knew the name of the kit- apprentice now - that had a crush on one of us. Lionpaw. His name didn't suit him well at all. He was skinny and smooth-furred, too gentle and kind to be a true lion.

A few days of observation made me believe he liked me, but I wouldn't tell Ripplebreeze that for all the prey in the world. Her confidence was more easily disturbed recently, like moss just barely clinging to a stone.

Lilystorm seemed to slip by whenever I passed her, hardly stopping to speak, only talking to Ripplebreeze to deliver news from Mother. She was kind, but she seemed shy around us. Less like we were family and more like we were friendly strangers.

I wouldn't dare say it, but I think she was afraid of us. It was a sickening thought, one that filled me up with confusion and anger. Just because Ripplebreeze was a bit more wild, I was a bit less gentle, doesn't mean she had the right to think we'd hurt her. Just because we thought differently didn't mean that we weren't family.

Now that we weren't her responsibility, Mother seemed to have no more time for us than the rest of the clan. She said she wanted to spend more time with us, but it seemed like I only ever heard from her through Lilystorm.

Not that I minded. Whenever we did talk face to face she would be full of questions about when I thought I was going to settle down, didn't I think I needed to be more careful, How come she never saw me with anyone but Ripplebreeze…

I shouldn't have to answer. She shouldn't expect me to jump into the life Ripplebreeze was afraid of, that was becoming wary of.

I kept everything quiet. It was better that no one knew.

* * *

><p>Mother perched near Brightstar as the other leader addressed the clans.<p>

"There's been a fox traipsing through our territory, getting pretty close to the border. I'd appreciate if you'd lend me some warriors, because I don't think it cares what side of the border it dines on."

Mother nodded, and named the patrol right there.

Ripplebreeze was on the patrol. I was on the patrol. Lilystorm was not.

By sun-high the next day, we were in Stormclan territory, milling about with the other clan's warriors. The only one who was remotely close to my age was a tom that looked annoyingly like Lionpaw, but closer to Thornpelt in age.

Mother and Brightstar split us into pairs, one Stormclan warrior with one Rainclan. Ripplebreeze got herded away with the Lionpaw-lookalike, and I got pushed aside with a stuffy-looking she cat.

I compulsively looked over at Ripplebreeze every few minutes. I was worried that she would do something in the name of keeping this interesting, but so far she seemed fine. She'd been more reckless lately, pushing herself too hard on patrols, walking along the edge of the lake when it was too dark to see. Still, for now she seemed as calm as she ever did, and I allowed myself to relax, only flicking my eyes over to her every now and then.

One time, however, my eyes lingered on a patch of ginger fur and two bright eyes just behind her and the Lionpaw-lookalike.

My partner looked over, ready to call my attention back to our task, but when she saw what had captured my attention, she called out. .

"Hey! Look out!"

Ripplebreeze looked up at me , then glanced behind her. Her partner was still focused on sniffing the ground.

Within seconds, everything shattered, actions splitting into separate realities.

The fox lunged out of the shadows, straight at the golden tom.

Simultaneously, Ripplebreeze turned, and using all of her weight, she shoved him out of the way.

And I screamed as the fox turned to her and crimson stained her throat.

AN/ WE. DID. IT.

Can you believe it/ I've been saying it was coming for months, and it's finally here.

This, children, is the collab with Vivalakateska (Formerly Brightstarswag). We decided to do it as a NaNoWriMo project, so we've been forced to get some work done. We're just under 10,000 words at the time I'm writing this, and we figured we could throw this at you guys.

However, we don't had a lot of time to edit, so don't expect chapters 'till December. They may come, but it's not likely. (betas, this is where you throw yourselves at us.)

We can answer your questions, if you happen to have them and they're not too spoilery. I write Pebbleheart's POV, and Kate covers Suntail, and we cross edit.

For now, questions, comments and criticism in the reviews!


	2. everything sucks, forever

When I wake up and it's still dark, I realize I must have had the dream again.

I can try all day and never remember the whole dream, just glimpses. The sensation of cats around me. Loud noises. Bright eyes. A flash of gold.

It's become routine, but that doesn't mean I enjoy it.

Some cats find comfort in knowing they're surrounded by people who care. I've never been one of those. When I'm this agitated, ready to snap at the slightest provocation, there's only one place for me to go.

Whisper quiet, I slip out of camp.

When I was a bit younger, I could sleep through the night, sometimes even part of the day. Then during my apprenticeship, I'd find myself unable to fall asleep. Soon after-

It wasn't long before I was unable to stay asleep too.

At first I would lay in my nest, fidgeting and staring at the sky until I would drop off from exhaustion or dawn roused me with a sun ray in my eyes.

One night, when I hadn't really slept in days but was as awake as ever, I wandered the territory out of sheer boredom. I knew all the places to avoid if I ever wanted to rest again, but I wasn't sure what else I could find.

Eventually I found a good place: A small area of tamped down grass under one of Rainclan's many willow trees. During the day it would be a wonderful respite from one of the frequent showers, but at night it was nothing more than a place of calm.

I find myself there now. After I fight the dream or an annoyingly persistent clanmate, it's the only place I can hope to find rest. Tonight, I have can almost believe that I'll actually find sleep again. if It'll be enough to keep me from stumbling through tomorrow is another question.

When I wake, I'm shivering from the dew that dapples my pelt and my eyes are too bleary to register what I'm seeing. In a few seconds everything resolves, and I see Lilystorm's concerned face hovering over mine.

"Was it a really dreadful one?"

One time I made the mistake of mentioning my nightmares to Lilystorm. I was sure I came off sounding breezy and unconcerned, like it was trivial, but I overestimated my sister's ability to forget.

So now instead of giving her an excuse for my occasional snippy behavior, I've given her a reason to run to mother and worry about me far more than necessary.

"It was just hot in camp. Greenleaf is coming soon, and I was always the most sensitive to temperature."

She gives me a look so disappointed, I almost consider telling her the truth, seeing if she can help me.

Almost. It's not hard to tell that if I let her see me like that, every bit of strength I've tricked her into thinking when she looks at me would vanish like mist in the sun.

We walk back to camp in quietly, until Lilystorm breaks the silence.

"I really wish you wouldn't go out like that."

I should think before I reply, but a sharp spike of emotions takes my words from me.

"Why should you care?"

She takes a tiny step backwards, but it's enough for me to notice and wince.

"Because I don't want to find you've been attacked in your sleep, so far from camp."

I'm proud and a little surprised and the lack of tremble in her voice. Still, I have to swallow my pride to give a nice answer.

"Nothing's ever out there but me, anyway."

"You," she insists, "And muskrats and cottonmouths and foxes."

I have to stop myself from flinching. That was low, and she knows it. I turn to her, fur prickling and ready to snarl at her, but when I see her expression I stop.

She doesn't look triumphant, she just looks concerned and a bit sad. I let myself drop.

"Fine. I promise not to get hurt. Let's just get back to camp before Silverthorn assigns patrols."

We're met with the yellow-furred ball of energy that calls itself Lionpaw.

"Hi, Pebbleheart! Oh, and hi Lilystorm!"

If she's offended that she was an afterthought, Lilystorm doesn't show it. She replies kindly and I try not to let a hiss escape my clenched teeth.

Lionpaw is always happy to see me, and always has been. I thought for sure he'd have the decency to back off, give me some space for a while.

But of course not. He"s let what I was sure was a little crush follow him through apprenticeship, turning into an overgrown thorn bush of ridiculous hope and childish want.

I'm sure that when he becomes a warrior in a few days and feels he can finally act on his feelings I'll be dragged down, forever ensnared in the mess that is Lionpaw. Until then, i'll be keeping myself as free of him as possible.

I give him a nod as i walk past, practically dragging Lilystorm to where we'll wait to be assigned to a patrol. We're late, and the clearing is nearly empty by the time we arrive.

"Who's left?" Silverthorn, our deputy, calls out from a high branch, "Okay, I want Hollyfeather, Lionpaw, and Pebbleheart to hunt. Lilystorm, you and I will cover the southern border."

Foxdung.

Hollyfeather will be Lionpaw's mentor only for a few more days. After those few days, my opinion of her will be drastically increased.

Lionpaw is apparently overly enthusiastic in everything he does, and instead of discouraging this, Hollyfeather has either encouraged or ignored this behavior.

There was no official leader to this patrol, but Hollfeather seems to have taken it upon herself as the eldest to fill that role. It's by her decision the we're fishing at the lake instead of hunting birds in the trees.

Fishing is not an exciting linger over the water, positioning yourself with care. Nearly an hour of waiting can be rewarded with only a few small fish.

Lionpaw doesn't seem to enjoy waiting any more than I do, but he deals with it in an entirely different way.

"Aurgh!" he wails, as once again his rapid strike into the water returns no prey. He sits, disgruntled and still on the shore for only seconds before making the same mistake again.

"You know, you're never going to catch anything like that," I say. With some cats I would attempt to keep the sarcasm out of my voice. Lionpaw is not one of those cats.

When he looks up at me, his expression is so wild and terrified looking I have to remind myself that purring will only make things worse. I _never _talk to him unless spoken to.

He must have realized the same thing, because when he responds, he's stuttering.

"I- um, I'm not the best at fishing and… yes."

"You're going to have to work on it. Your final assessment is coming soo-on," Hollyfeather sings. Her attitude always made me like her more than her sister, and this is no exception.

His face falls, and I can't help but feel a bit bad for him.

"look, you can't just blindly flail into the water. you've got to be gentle. Quiet."

that advice came to me from an unlikely source, one that wouldn't, really couldn't tell him first hand. It feels slightly wrong to be telling him, like i'm eating prey that will make me sick.

Still, when he tries it and it works, everyone seems a bit happier with me.

It feels nice to walk into camp, carrying prey and surrounded by happy cats. Much nicer than slinking in alone.

Any residual happiness vanishes when I see Mother striding up to me. She looks as she always does, clean but slightly ruffled. Even when she's right in front of me, I know her mind's anywhere but here.

"Pebbleheart! Looks like you got some good catches in! Why don't you set those down and come talk with me in my den for a bit?"

I don't want to, but I'm not being given the chance to refuse. One more problem with being the leader's daughter.

I turn to nod a goodbye at the other cats from the patrol, but only Lionpaw is still there. He nods back and dashes off, probably to look for his littermates. I'm slightly relieved, because somehow the pack of them is less trouble than one on its own.

I set the couple of fish I managed to catch down on the prey pile, and take a deep breath to steady myself. Mother's den has never been a place I enjoy being.

It started at kithood, when it was the one place in camp we were forbidden from. As soon as I was old enough to know I didn't want to go in, it became the place mother would drag me into once a moon.

I squeeze into the dark space between the roots of the biggest willow in camp. Why Mother chose this as her personal space, I'll never understand.

I can barely make out her outline, but I can see her motion for me to sit down. Uneasily, I do.

"How are you?"

_Don't over think it. _I'd love to, and I definitely have twisted barbs into mothers words that she didn't intend. If she wants to offend me, she will. I do not need another reason to mistrust her.

"Pretty good. patrolling was fun. "

Her tail flicks. "Really? I haven't hear you say that in a while. Who were you with?"

"Hollyfeather, and Lionpaw." Short, quick answers will be my salvation.

I can't see her face, but I'm sure her eyes widened at my words.

"Lionpaw will most likely be a warrior in time for it to be announced at the gathering," She leans in close and whispers, like we weren't the only cats in earshot already. "I have to wonder what that'll mean for you."

She purrs, but I have to choke down a hiss.

Thankfully, Silverthorn barges in before I get the chance to respond.

"Icestar! Swanfeather's kitting!"

"Oh!" Her eyes shine. "I better go check on her." She bustles of of the den, leaving me with images I never want coinciding in my mind.

Lionpaw, Mother's plans,and kitting.

Lionpaw isn't even that bad of a cat, I think on the way to my nest. It's that everyone's expectations are horrible things with gnashing teeth. Lionpaw expects me to fall in love with him the second he has a warrior name. Both of our families expect kits within a couple moons.

No one bothered to ask what I expect of my own life, and it surely isn't that. I know exactly what to expect if follow that path, and I have plenty of reason to fear it.

Expectations will be the death of me, and I won't be their first victim.


	3. the one with the face

AN/ YOOHOO, ANYONE HOME?

But seriously, it's starting to feel like we're throwing this story into the void. Reviews would be welcomed with love and cookies.

The gathering. Great Starclan, that gathering.

Regardless, have a chapter.

Suntail had been perhaps one of the only brightly-coated cats in that gathering, making him jumpy and nervous. He hated feeling like an outsider.  
>"Stupid furball," Suntail spat at himself. "get a hold of yourself. You're Stormclan's pride and joy!"<p>

He flashed an apologetic blink to his medicine cat sister, even though he doubted she had heard him. She twitched her ears in confusion.  
>A young, chestnut apprentice bounced up, seeming as pesky as ever. She nearly yowled, "Hi Suntail!"<p>

Suntail nearly mrrowed out lowed in amusement . _Yet another unfortunate soul to fall under the spell of Suntail, great warrior extraordinaire_, he thought, _another poor she-cat to love the perfect muscles and hunting skills._ Suntail was quite indifferent to matters of personal appearance, all cats were wonderful to him himself?, He _had_ to be perfect, otherwise he was as unimportant as any passing cat.

At an unexpected paw swipe, the cats gathered around him dispatched. _Mousebrain, you missed the meeting, being so self-absorbed. Next time pay attent-  
><em> Everything stopped. All the self-congratulatory thoughts, all the friendly nods in his direction, all the thoughts of living up to his own expectations of behavior just stopped.  
>There she was: a beautiful she-cat whose eyes he got lost in. A stranger. Suntail tried to envision himself knowing her, but he suddenly felt inadequate. One part of his brain told him to run to her, telling her everything about himself. He hoped she won't turn him down.<br>On the other hand, he wanted to run, get as far away from her as possible. He didn't want to remember. He didn't want to lose control. He _remembered_, past whatever was pushing him towards her. _Oh, Starclan, I remember everything. _  
>Suntail's mind went from blank to the dreaded memory of fighting the fox as the two clans became one, even if it was for just a minute. <em>The Rainclan warrior,<em> Suntail shivered, _I basically killed her. Great Starclan, she was a new appointed warrior!  
><em>And by the way this cat was looking at him, she remembered too. And there was a good chance she hated him for it.

Suntail trotted off, shaking himself in dismay. He smelled a Rainclan cat approach. _Please don't be- _

It was her. Her smell filled the young tom's nostrils and he couldn't control himself. He needed to talk to this lovely she-cat. So, he did; this lead to something neither of them expected.  
><em>Oh Starclan..<em>

He lost control.

)O()O(

I saw the tom within seconds of arriving at the gathering place. I noticed he was staring at me just after Mother finished speaking. And as he meets my eyes and jerks away, I know where I've seen him before.

For a moment, it seemed like he was moving towards me, but now I see he's moving away, and quickly. Cats part before him like grass in the wind, letting him get away much faster than I'd manage.

Without giving myself time to think, I follow.

Even trailing close behind him, I have to nudge cats away to keep up. The Lionpaw-lookalike is faster than he looks, and considerably less impeded by chatting queens. Still, he stops in a quieter edge of the neutral territory, and I'm able to catch up.

At first, he doesn't notice me, but when he does he looks ready to bolt. His pelt puffs up- Great StarClan, is that all _fur?_- and his eyes go wide, skating over my pelt, my eyes, and every possible escape route.

"Hello. You're Brightstar's son, aren't you?" I force honey into my words. How long has it been since I tried to sound nice? And why am I wasting it on him, of all cats?

His pelt smooths a bit, making him considerably smaller, but he's still one of the largest cats I've seen. It seems like no small amount of that is fur, though, and the rest is arrogance. (definitely not enough trained muscle to kill me.) He keeps his chest puffed out, his head held high. It's fairly clear that I'm not his concern- I could turn pink and start screaming and he'd barely bat an eye. He's focused on himself, and how everyone else is reading him.

For once, this is a part I can play with ease. I barely react as he drawls out a standard answer- "Yes, I'm Suntail, and you?" and answer in an equally blasé manner.

"Of course. I'm Pebbleheart."

The conversation drops long enough for the rational part of my mind to ask the rest of me where I'm going with this. In all honesty, I don't know. In a way, this cat is responsible for changing my life in the worst possible way. Shouldn't I want to take revenge?

_What would a great warrior do?_

I could ponder whose voice is worming it's way through my thoughts, but for now the message seems more important. If I have learned anything in all of this, it's that the passive accomplish nothing.

But before I act, I need more information. I need to know weather I will lash out with fury and pain, or forgiveness and sorrow.

I need more time. The two clans are separating, Mother and Brightstar nodding their goodbyes. Our shaded corner, thankfully, is ignored.

I pull something out of the air. "I've heard you're one of the best warriors in the clans. Would you care to give me some lessons?"

"When exactly do you think I'd do that?" He's practically purring. Suddenly, I have to resist the urge to claw his smug face.

I take a deep breath. "Now."

His eyes widen. "Seriously? The gathering's over. Definitely no time." Once again, he's looking for ways out, but I stay in his path. I can't let this cat get away, not when I'm on the verge of something big.

_Forgiveness, or fury?_ I don't care to speculate.

"I won't be missed if you won't" A complete lie- even if Lilystorm doesn't notice I'm gone, I'm sure Lionpaw will. Or Thornpelt, Lionpaw's less annoying but still very present older brother.

In fact, this might not have been my best idea. I'm close to saying I won't mind if he says no when he makes up my mind for me.

"I guess I can stay for a bit."

I suck in a breath. This is my opportunity. This is my chance to finally take action, to get my life back in some small way. I push back the fear, the hint of vertigo at being so close to a catalyst-

And I lunge.

* * *

><p>I'm far from a bad fighter. Though real battles are rare, I'm confident that if I was in one I would come out more or less alive, hopefully faring better than my opponent. And now, I have the advantage of surprise. Even though my claws are sheathed, even though I'm careful not to wound, I'm confident I'll come out ahead.<p>

That doesn't stop Suntail from pinning me in a matter of seconds.

"What," he pants, "was that about?"

"Practice. That's why we're here, right?" I suppose I'm sizing him up. Trying to see if he deserves punishment of some sort. Following that logic, he's already passed one test- I attacked him, and he struck to incapacitate, not to kill. His next test will be how he reacts.

To my surprise, he purrs. "Okay, then. Lesson one: A good warrior is never caught off guard. Surprise will never give you an edge against warriors of Stormclan."

Not quite a pass. He's acting like a spoiled apprentice. Annoying, but nothing inherently malevolent. Still, I deal with enough real apprentices to not feel like taking an extra quietly.

I relax a bit, shrinking away from him. I wait until he mirrors me, consciously or not, and I spring.

He's heavier than me, and the move doesn't go as planned. When I practiced with cats my size, it had been simple to flip under them and slam up, pushing them off and over. Here, i'm only able to send him stumbling, but it's enough. a few key swipes send him to the ground.

"Lesson two," I purr, "Brute strength will never give you an edge against warriors of Rainclan."

There's a moment of pause, both of us looking at eachother with a mixture of amusement and appraising. It shatters when we fall into battle once again.

It's nothing like fighting one of my clanmates. Rainclan relies on quick thinking and exploiting the weaknesses of their opponent when their own strengths fall short. Stormclan seems to teach a far simpler, if equally effective method: beat them until they give in.

He's stronger than me, and he uses it to his advantage. Even with claws sheathed, blows can hurt. I'm able to hold ,my own by using some Rainclan tricks- not the ancient moves, but simple things. Still, my mind is split and I make far more mistakes than I'd like.

I'm still trying to read him- Is his instinct to injure or impede? The more I see, the more convinced I am he's not a bad cat. A bit too sure of himself, but not evil by any means. It's hard to think this is that cat who sat and stared as Ripplebreeze-

But I don't fear him. And when we come to a draw, and I drop to the ground in an exhausted but purring heap, I don't flinch when he lands next to me.


	4. hey suntail have you finished those erra

"Hey, you wanna go hunting?"

I pulled myself up, shaking kinks out of my muscles. Judging by the sun, I'd been napping on a warm, flat stretch of grass for a couple of hours. And it was no surprise that Pinepaw was the one to wake me.

Pretty much every she-cat my age without a mate had, at one point, wanted me as a mate. It wasn't me being vain- At least, I hoped it wasn't. _That _ would be embarrassing. No, I'm just good stock- leader's son, stong, great warrior, and, of course, terribly handsome and kind. Pinepaw wasn't the first, and likely wouldn't be the last, to harbor a crush. But, she did happen to be my favorite, even if she was incredibly annoying.

She was cute- Not ridiculously beautiful like Dewblossom, or witty like Birchpetal. She was a clumsy apprentice whose eyes lit up when I let her spend time with me, and being with her was refreshing after the calculated dances of the other she cats.

So did I want to go hunting? Of course. It was the little things that kept life worth living, after all- Warm prey, soft nest, happy clanmates, happy Suntail.

We traipsed into the territory, Pinepaw leading the way. Her nose never left the ground in front of her, seeking out a scent. I let my focus wander to the forest around us. The sun had just began to emerge from wherever it fled to in leaf-bare, and only a gentle breeze kept it from being muggy.

"It's finally getting nice out again."

Pinepaw flinched when I broke the silence, along with her concentration, but soon she purred. "Yep! It's times like this I feel bad for Rainclan. Always raining and stuff," She turned back to the ground.

A flick of anxiety that sleep had chased away returned, but I had to think to place when I did, it only grew.

At last night's gathering, the she cat- Pebbleheart- and I had stayed back and fought. Somehow, she'd bested me. And I, being the idiot I occasionally am, challenged her to a rematch. She'd purred and said she'd be back the next night.

And I'd agreed.

I kept my gait steady behind Pinepaw, but it was hard. I shouldn't, couldn't meet her. _Technically_, we wouldn't be breaking the code- wewould be in neutral territory, and of course we weren't _mates _or anything. But it still felt… illicit. Wrong, somehow.

But deep in my heart, I knew I'd go. Whatever had driven me towards her in the first place was still at work, and it wasn't letting me go that easily.

When night broke, and the rest of the clan stayed safe in their nests, I flew.

Surely my heartbeat could be heard throughout the territories. It was thrumming hard enough to make me shake, ear to tail-tip.

Still, I let my paws carry me through the territory as fast as I'd dare, keeping in mind my bleary eyes and the number of trees in my path. I'd stopped worrying about staying quiet several fox-lengths back.

I'd been shocked by how easily I managed to get out of camp- Don't we have _guards _ for this? But the true test would be if I'd be able to make it to the gathering place without turning back, tail between my legs.

Words pounded in my head, a mantra simultaneous with the thuds of my pulse against my chest.

_You're not doing anything wrong. It's not against the code to be friends. You're not even friends with her, the crazy she-cat._

Crazy though she may be, she was lodged in my mind like a stubborn pebble in the paw of an apprentice.

Heh. Pebble.

_Not funny_, I decided, pressing on.

She was the type of cat Brightstar would take one look at and say burned brightly, with a passion for things he didn't understand. She was the type of cat Swansong would expect in her den often, needing to be treated for careless injuries. She was the type of cat who lured Stormclan's notoriously lazy prodigy out of bed to hike across the territory in the middle of the night for reasons unknown.

She'd given an excuse, of course, but not one that I believed. I may be dense at times, but I'm not stupid.

Still, that left the question: Why had I come?

It surely wasn't because I cared that much about besting her. My pride was wounded, but no one important would ever know. It surely _did _ have something to do with the odd, compulsion-like feeling I got whenever I thought about turning back.

It wasn't a compulsion like I sometimes got to run, or like a craving for a certain type of prey. It was a feeling like a gentle nudge from a distant, cool presence, and the stirrings of some memory on the edge of being forgotten. Or at least, one I _wanted_ to forget.

Before I had time to ponder further, I arrived.

She wasn't immediately visible, and for a moment I wondered if she was waiting in a tree, ready to jump down and ambush him.

_Maybe I over-thought it. Maybe she did just want to fight-_

Just as I prepared to shift into a defensive stance, I caught sight of her.

Pebbleheart was curled in a ball, pressed into the roots of a tree, tightly asleep. This was when I would normally insert adjectives like 'delicate' or 'dappled with darker flecks like shadows from the leaves of swaying trees', but in truth, none of them fit. She whimpered between quiet snores, and twitched every time a breeze so much as tickled her fur.

I stepped forward- a "Hey, should I just go home?" ready on my lips- and her eyes shot open.

"Oh. It's just you."

And like that, she'd annoyed me. _Just _him? Yeah, it was _just_ the cat who had pried himself out of his nest, and dragged his still-mostly-asleep body across the entirety of Stormclan territory to be here for StarClan-knows-what-reason, besides the odd pushy-compulsiony feeling that was honestly starting to get a little creepy.

But I couldn't fit all of that into one breath, so instead I said: "Were you expecting anyone else?"

She pulled herself to her paws, and stretched. "No, it's just that the rather delightful nightmare I was having contained a particularly charming murderer, and I was concerned it had followed me into my waking life."

For all her brash words and sarcasm, she was trembling slightly. The murderer, I deduced, was likely not a faceless character, but a true threat.

But that wasn't exactly what I'd call "pressing," or my problem." Seeing Pebbleheart, and the wild gleam in her admittedly-pretty eyes, had reminded me I wasn't here to lull a she-cat back to sleep.

"So, why exactly did I drag my still-mostly-asleep body across the entirety of Stormclan territory?"

She blinked. "Didn't you want a rematch?" Her posture radiated an innocence like honey- sticky and cloying. It never made it to her eyes, which remained wild and skating all over me- The powerful muscles of my shoulders, the defined angles of my jaw, the way my own posture showed annoyance and anticipation.

I _swear, _it's not ego. It's empathy.

I knew a thing or two about showing a story that you didn't feel in your heart. And I'm far from hard to look at, honestly. Call me a narcissist, but modesty had no place when trying to empathize- You were trying to see what they saw, not what you should be seeing.

And I saw a cat who was terrified that her ruse was being see through. So I went easy.

"Look, I know that's not why you called me here, and I know that's not why I came. I'm admittedly sleep-deprived and probably won't remember the specifics of this conversation tomorrow, and I'd highly appreciate if you'd cut to the chase."

She deflated like she'd been hit in the gut.

"You saw that, did you?" At my nod, she continued. "Okay, this isn't going like I planned. I'm also sleep deprived, you're annoying me, I'm annoying you, I have no idea what we're doing here, let's go home." Her attitude had turned dangerous in seconds. She'd gone from hanging her head, in sleep and maybe shame, to pacing and lashing her tail.

"Great," I lied, "I just want to let you know the journey back is probably going to kill me. "

I turned, but before I got out of earshot, her voice reached me.

"Stay, then."

I whirled around. "What do you mean, 'Stay'?" A fevered hope bloomed in my chest that she wasn't implying anything like I thought there was a chance she was implying.

The good news: she looked a bit horrified that she had even spoken, and shook her head.

"I always sleep in the territory, and nothing bad's ever happened. It's neutral territory. I'll be awake early, I'll let you know when to go home. At least you'll be a bit less tired on the journey."

Her reaction intrigued me- She didn't want to stay the night with me, but she was desperately hoping I'd stay.

_I'll bite._

"Sounds fine to me. Just don't let me oversleep, please?"

"Okay." She looked at me oddly, but settled down where she'd been before I'd got there, eyeing me before scrunching her eyes closed.

I walked over and curled up next to her- Just close enough that our spines brushed, and neither of us would get cold. Still, she flinched and hissed through her teeth.

"Hey, just keeping warm. Just shove me if I roll over on you."

She murmured something about me being too fat to shove, and I decided to ignore her and how this whole scene would look to an outsider.

Still, I couldn't sleep. She'd relaxed a bit, but something was nagging me.

"Hey, Pebbleheart, are you asleep yet?"

"If I was, I wouldn't be any more."

"I was just thinking- If you figure out why you called me over here, leave a red rock right here, and I'll do the same if I figure out why I came. I'll check every day if you will."

"And then what?" came her sleepy reply.

"Well, if you see the rock, then you come that night, i'll do the same, and we'll talk."

She snorted in reply.

AN/ Wow, we asked, and you guys delivered. (In reviews, that is. Feel free to keep doing that.) We're kinda hoping that this chap counteract's any negative opinions of Sun based on his ego at the last chap. He's go a heart! It's just hard to find under that fluff. Idea!- Super fluffy Suntail plushie to all reviewers.


	5. what the hickety heck

I wake up, and for a moment am confused by the sound of breathing coming from behind me. i am clearly in the territory, not my close-packed den.

When I see Suntail' golden pelt, I wonder if I'm still dreaming, even as memories seep back into my mind.

But I'm not good at lying to myself, as much as I'd sometimes wish it. I know exactly why he is here, and I turn my eyes skyward.

The smallest hint of sun is beginning to peak out from behind the clouds, and moisture hangs heavy in the air. Morning is imminent.

I stretch a bit, my back sore and tight from sleeping in a tense ball on the ground. This doesn't wake Suntail. I mew out a "Hey, get up." This doesn't wake Suntail. I gently nudge his flank. Still, he snores on.

For such an athletic cat, he sleeps like a bear in the winter. It takes me jabbing him in the neck with my claws before he jumps up and looks at the sky.

I expect some kind of sarcasm, or a joke. It would be typical for what I know of his behavior, after all. but instead, he just barely spits out "Thanks! Bye! Remember the rocks!" before shooting back into the trees.

I purr as i begin my slower trek back to Rainclan and the sun grows larger, a heavy weight on the horizon. Yes, I'll remember the rocks. For now, though, I have one more test of my will.

Lionpaw's warrior ceremony was pushed back a single day when Hazlesmoke went and scraped the bottom of her jaw tripping over her own paws. I should probably have been more concerned about her, but instead I Spent my reprieve thanking Starclan for those precious few hours and worrying about my coming meeting with Suntail.

Now they have both passed, and I sit through the opening of the dreaded ceremony. It is fairly uneventful, for something so dire. I find myself seated between Lilystorm and Lionpaw's mother, Honeygaze, while he and his siblings get their names.

Lionpelt, Lightclaw, and Goldenstream bask in the clan's admiration.

Throughout the ceremony, though, I find myself distracted, my eyes turning to Honeygaze. She's beaming just as much as her children, and it strikes me that this is a victory to her, too. Her first litter raised to warriors.

She had another litter, one with some warrior that died before I was born, in a botched mission with my own father. She carried four kits for moons, kitting just moons before Icestar. Two of the kits died- It was never made clear to me if they were stillborn or died after birth. Regardless, it _was_ made clear to me that this is proof that bad things come in three. (At least, so said the chatty elder sharing the gossip.)

While it's not unusual to have more than one mate, you're expected to go about it with dignity. Talk to all parties involved, make sure everyone's comfortable before you ruin everything with kits.

Honegaze apparently did not take those steps. She was pregnant with Rushtail's kits before she made it know she was also attached to Shadowstrike. She wasted no time after Rushtail's death and her failed litter to start again. Thornpelt and Fennelpaw are barely three moons older than me, and Lionpelt's litter was kitted when I was still in the nursery.

Even though Thornpelt is a good warrior, Fennelpaw chose the path of medicine cat, and I suspect Honeygaze was less than thrilled to see Thornpelt sitting vigil alone.

I was close to the opposite. I had been ecstatic to see Thornpelt become a warrior, if only because it meant he'd stop trying to tag along with Ripplepaw and I. And now? I'm dreading the second Lionpelt's vigil ends.

I know, logically, nothing can happen without my approval. The worst scenario is that he uses his new status as my equal to move from clumsy adoration to outright flirting, but that doesn't stop it from worrying me.

_Maybe that's my reason for summoning Suntail. If he'd killed me in battle, i'd never have to deal with this again._

The thought tightens the knot in my stomach, and I barely notice Lilystorm shepherding me towards them until we're there.

"Congradulations! Do you like your new names?"

"Oh, they're great," Lightclaw sings. "I particularly like mine. It's fierce, like me."

Lightclaw throws an exaggerated pose, Goldenstream purrs, and Lionpelt shakes his head.

"Hey, do you two have any tips for vigil?" Lionpelt asks, seemingly bent on ignoring his sister.

"Well, I think the best way to avoid talking is to think. You'll have plenty of time."

Lilystorm stares at me expectantly, and I rack my mind for something useful. They may be annoying little furballs, but no one deserves the embarrassment of a failed vigil.

"Remember that you weren't even alive the last time we were attacked. It's nothing, whatever it is."

Lightclaw purrs, and Lionpelt flashes Goldenstream a look that says: "I told you so!" loud and clear.

_They're really not so bad, _I think. When the sun hits them just right, if I tilt my head and squint I can see myself and my sisters in them. Lilystorm's timidness in Goldenstream. Ripplebreeze's tenacity in Lightclaw.

And yes, even a bit of myself in Lionpelt. He may be the most annoying scrap this side of the river, but he's my clanmate. I could almost see being his friend, if only-

"Hey, maybe tomorrow you can help Lionpelt find a den," Lightclaw nudges me, before shooting an amused glance at her brother.

And it's gone. With a snort, I stalk off.

* * *

><p>"Hey, Thornpelt was looking for you."<p>

Blossomflight catches me just before I reach the den I share with Lilystorm, Hollyfeather and Dapplelark. I nod at her before rolling my neck and setting off in search of the tom, fear roiling in my heart. Thornpelt was on guard duty last night. What are the odd he noticed me sneaking off?

When we were younger,Thornpelt had been a literal thorn in our collective paws. Mother had tried to impress upon us how he didn't have many friends his own age, and we should include him.

Lilystorm had been the only one to heed her words, and while it was rude of Ripplebreeze and I, could you blame us? We were little she-kits, we didn't want to play with a tom that was older than us.

Now that I've grown up, I realize he's not so bad. If nothing else, he's never snapped at me, and he's patient with Lilystorm.

_Let's see if he ruins it by confronting me._

I find him in his den, a scrape under a willow tree he shares with Nettlepelt and Bramblestorm. I much prefer my cozy cave between river-smoothed boulders, even if I rarely sleep in it.

"You were looking for me?"

"Oh, yeah. I wanted to ask you something. Can we walk?"

It sends alarms flashing, but I still follow him past camp. When they feel like they need to separate you from the clan to tell you, it's never good news.

Eventually we reach the Rockpile, a huge hill of pebbles and rocks that probably fell from some mountain long ago. It's a popular place to relax outside of camp, and I let my worry fade a bit. If it was a big deal, he'd make a bigger effort to take me somewhere hidden.

"So, Lionpelt's a warrior now."

My stomach drops. Please, Starclan, not him too. I'd practically prefer the confrontation. I nod, eyeing him warily.

"I know he's not exactly subtle, so you probably realize he likes you, right?" He turns a bit, kicked-up dust landing like ash on his honey-brown pelt.

More nods, more nerves.

"Do you want me to talk to him about that? I know he gets a bit… Intense, at times. And no one else is going to tell him to lay off.

"That would be amazing." No other words, no more eloquent way to say it. I wonder if he can see the relief easing across my face.

"He may not listen to me, but I'll try."

"Thank you, Thornpelt. You're my savior."

"Any time," he purrs, and I start to walk away.

"Wait, one more question."

"Shoot."

"Can I ask why else you don't like him? I figure if I'm going to give him advice, I'll go all the way," He pauses for a it, thinking, "Unless, of course, it's that he didn't get the good looks in the family. Not everyone can be this lucky."He puff out his chest and bares his teeth, and I can't help but purr, even as I consider his question. I finally decide that no, looks have nothing to do with it. My mind flicks to the other golden tom I know, Stormclan's prodigy. He's far from hard to look at, though I'd never admit it.

"No, it's not looks. It's," I search for words, give my ears a flick, "it's a lot of things. Don't be afraid to quote me on that."

I leave while we're both still purring.

* * *

><p>Back at camp, I make a point to stop and visit Swanfeather in the nursery. I've yet to see my kin's kits, but Lilystorm refuses to stop fawning over them.<p>

They're asleep, which is far from surprising. Swanfeather, however, is awake, and waves me in.

"I was wondering when you'd stop by. Come in, I'll introduce you."

The light in the nursery is dim, but Swanfeather's ivory pelt shines like a beacon. She curled around two tiny kits, both almost as light-furred as their mother.

"The tom is Stagkit, and the she kit Snowkit."

"Hello, Kits," It feels weird, talking to these two little scraps that probably couldn't even understand me if they weren't sleep. But Swanfeather's stare compels me to say something.

"They're a bit more fun when they're awake. You should stop by around sunhigh."

She looks in my eyes, a gaze so similar to Mother's I nearly do a double take. It's an invitation, but it's also a dismissal.

I duck out of the den and head towards my own.

The camp is nearly silent, cats either tucked into their small dens scattered around camp or out in the territory, relaxing in the budding moonlight. Lilystorm and Dapplelark are already curled up in their tufty nests, warming up the cramped den. How we all cramned in with Ripplebreeze, too, I'll never understand.

It's actually a bit uncomfortable. Greenleaf nights are alway muggy in Rainclan, the heat blending with the moisture in a way that leaves the air feeling like sweat. This night is no exception. We'll be bumping into each other all night, suffocating on our own breath. Under normal circumstances, I'd already be under my willow tree, somewhere where the air is less stagnant and familiar.

But if I leave camp, I'll have to answer to Lionpelt's litter, so I may as well try to stay here. I fall into my nest, pressing my spine into the comparatively-cool surface of the stone. I catch sight of Hollyfeather striding across camp as Lilystorm begins snoring softly.

It's going to be a long night.

AN/ No reviews to thank for, but oh well. Back to Pebble's angst.

I feel like this chap was a bit exposition-heavy, how about you? Related question, if i may: So far, who's your favorite charracter? most of the exposition's out of the way, but major development has not begun. They're all so innocent;-;

Enough rambling. Re-veew if your coole111!11


	6. somebody's gotta do it

I yawned and stretched my aching limbs. Nightmares weren't usually something that could scare the fleas off of me, and I'd never ruin my reputation by looking or acting scared in front of my clan mates, but this nightmare was simply chilling. I decided it was better to forget about it than dwell, I set out to the camp in case someone needed my help with patrolling or hunting. Really, who wouldn't want the leader's son on their patrol?

I swaggered out of the warriors den and strutted up to Brightstar, who seemed to be muttering under her breath. Swansong's name was mentioned a few times and it sparked my interest. She looked like she was about to explode, or implode. To be honest they were the same thing in my book.

"Something wrong, Brightstar?" I ask in almost a mewl. I had the most adorable mewl, Brightstar wouldn't be able to resist- or any other she-cat,for that matter.

"Out of the den, please, Suntail. I have a massive load to think about."

I smirked. I _knew _she wanted me there. "Well, I'm not really _in-"_

_"SUNTAIL, OUT!" _Brightstar startled, I shrugged off the entire situation and walked back out into the clearing.

"Suntail!" An all-too-familiar voice called. _She-cats, please, it's barely sun-high. _Pinepaw trotted towards me with a cat no older than six moons tailing a mouse length behind her. "Hi, Suntail! Do you know what day it is?" Of course not.I looked up at the sky for some sort of sign.

"First day of new-leaf? I guessed, feeling more unsure of everything with thoughts of Pinepaw stirring up thoughts of the mysterious grey Raincan she cat.

Pinepaw looked like a hurt kit. "N-no. It's my warrior ceremony today. My sister, Harekit," She nodded at the small kit beside her. "is going to be made an apprentice today, too,," Pinepaw diverted her gaze and focused on a blade of grass. In a fit of remorse, I brushed my muzzle against the top of her head.

"I knew that, duh," I meowed. Pinepaw's mood instantly became better and she zoomed off to the apprentice den, probably to tell clan mates.

"All cats old enough to catch their own prey, please come and join me under the Tunnel," All cats, sleeping or not, shook themselves and head to the front of the rock tunnel, leading them outside of camp. Brightstar jumped onto the top of the largest rock in a swift, strong movement. "Welcome. Today is a special day, as I'm sure this she-cat has told you. Today, we honor Pinepaw, as she has fulfilled her apprentice duties," A silence fell over the clan as Pinepaw tried to get on top of the Tunnel as quickly as possible. She reached the top and shook her coat out of either anxiousness or eagerness.

_Maybe both, _I thought_._

"Molepelt, has Pinepaw completed all the necessary actions to become a full-fledged warrior of Stormclan?" Molepelt snorted in a humorous way, and nodded.

"She has," the old tom meowed.

"Then, by the power of Starclan, I pronounce you to be Pinefur. Starclan honors your honesty and strength and rejoices in your victories." Brightstar pressed her muzzle behind Pinefur's ear and licked her. Pinefur gave a mew in delight.

_"Pinefur! Pinefur! Pinefur!"_

Pinefur bounded down and stood next to her old mentor. Brightstar looked back to the crowd and spoke again.

"We have another ceremony today, Harekit" Brightstar meowed. Harekit looked flustered as she used her tiny limbs to slowly reach the top.

"It has been six moons since Harekit was born. She is ready to be made an apprentice," Harekit stared up a Brightstar with total admiration. "Flowernose, will you take Harekit on as your apprentice."

Flowernose was a few moons older than me, and her eyes lit up and she started bouncing with eagerness, then she nodded.

"By the power of Starclan, I pronounce you Harepaw. Carry you wisdom through the moons." Brightstar rested her muzzle on Harepaw's head. I joined in with the chanting again.

_"Harepaw! Harepaw! Harepaw!"_

I sighed in relief and walked over to Pinefur. "Nice name," I teased "I still think ine's awesomer, though," Pinefur let out a _mrrow_ of amusement and swatted my ear with her paw, claws sheathed.

"You're just jealous, Suntail!" She teased back. She quickly added, "Oh! Suntail, I had my ceremony early, so I need to sit vigil, but I was scheduled to patrol. Can you fill in for me?"

I nodded and walked off to the leader's den. Brightstar was muttering and Swansong again, but I didn't mention it this time. "I'm going to fill in for Pinefur during the patrol at Sunset," I told her. Brightstar nodded curtly. As I turned tail, she called me back.

"Wait, Suntail, can I talk to you?" I went back inside her den and sat down. "Suntail, have you noticed something different about Swansong recently?"

_Oh Starclan.. How am I supposed to tell her I haven't really talked to Swansong since half a moon ago?_

I went with: _"_Not really, no, why do you ask?" instead.

"She came to me today and asked if I was really her mother. I didn't know what to say, other than that I am," Brightstar confided.

"Well, she is yours, right?" I asked in pure curiosity, not accusingly. Brightstar looked quite taken aback and furious.

"Of course she" my kit! She's your litter mate for Starclan's sake! Just-just go to your patrol," she sighed and turned around.

I walked out more confused then I was when I walked in.

After a normal patrol, nothing more serious than a stale badger scent, I went to the fresh kill pile, picked up a plump mole, and sat in a group of friendly faces, eating happily. When sleepiness finally washed over me, I found the coziest spot in the warriors den and slept.

Around moonhigh, I was prodded awake by a slender, elder she-cat. "Meet me outside the Tunnel," she mewed quietly and stalked out. I followed her out quickly.

"Hawkpelt, what is this all about?" I asked in a whisper once we were out of the tunnel.

"Your _sister," _Hawkpelt hissed. _Sister_ came out in fragments, almost like a joke. "she's not right."

"Wait, what? What do you mean, she's not right?" I was growin impatient, and my tone hardened. "Tell me, now!"

Hawkpelt shook her head, snorting, and walked back into camp.

*8*8*8*8*8*8*8*

AN/ Hi guys! Ice here. Bright, the illustrious writer of this chap, mother/creator of the gorgeous, fairly arrogant, slightly oblivious Suntail, was reached out to for comment. I received this in reply:

"nah all is well"

But it's okay. You guys like me, right?

*awkward silence*

Lemme apologize for the longish gap between chaps- The next chap is actually written, so expect it within a few days.

Question of the day: Who's your favorite character so far? Let us know, espescially if its a minor charrie. We need to know who to give more love!

Reviewers get a super-fluffy Suntail plushie, non reviewers get a maybe plush/ maybe live fox. Don't take chances!

I'm kidding. Kinda.


	7. darling im a nightmare dressed as a cat

The ground below me is light, but the sky above presses on my shoulders with a terrible force. I'd fall straight through the grass, if it weren't for the current of the cats running along side me, the swiftness of their paws not giving me enough time to light or sink.

It seems we are moving impossibly fast, colors blurring together to where I can't tell a tree from the lake. But still, three pelts stand out, two running in tandem and one stalking off to the side. One the black of wetted ashes, one the molten gold of the sun. One smoldering orange like embers.

Just as it feels the wind is going to tear my fur off, we stop. The flame that had been prowling the edges, waiting for an opening to exploit, lunges and becomes entangled with the black and gold until their colors subside to the sharp red of new roses.

The current falls, the tide surging out past shore, and I am well and truly falling. The last shreds of color, already spiderweb thin, spiral to black, and waking feels like being pulled out of swirling stream.

My eyes clear before I come to my senses, taking in the sloping walls of our den, stuffed full with swaying pelts in varying shades of tortoiseshell and grey. The air is over-warm and carries with it the scents of grass and rain and sweat.

Dapplelark's head lifts, blinking in the dim light. "Pebbleheart? Are you okay?"

Inexplicable rage leaps in my chest for a just a second. If I said no, what exactly would she do? Lull me back to sleep? I'm no kit, and she's no caring mother.

But even as I think it, I know it's ridiculous. We're friends. Of course she's concerned.

"Yeah, just had a nightmare."

Her amber eye shines as she tilts her head. The ragged scar that mars the other isn't visible in this dark, and her face looks half-finished. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"No, I think I'm just going to get some air," I step out of the den before she responds, picking my way over my sister's form. A gentle rain falls on my head, my back. Such a common occurrence in the spring I hardly notice it. For once, I'm able to walk out of camp without sneaking, I just flick my ears at Lichenfur. My former mentor knows me well enough not to wonder what could have lead me out of my nest on the fringes of a storm.

On the walk to my willow, Dapplelark's question flitters around my head , a tiny mosquito not afraid to bite. "Do you want to talk about it?" I've heard that question so many times, and nearly always replied with the same resolute "No". Even when I was little, I knew whatever I said in "confidence" could come back and haunt me.

As far back as I can remember, Ripplebreeze and I had kept an unspoken pact: Anything said under starlight and shadow would never be mentioned in the day. It was at night that my sleep-addled mind was most willing to speak about the things I knew I should keep secret, and it was at night that Ripplebreeze's vulnerability would seep through, smooth as water in a stream.

Luckily, the lesson that this rule didn't hold with everyone wasn't one I learned first hand. I remember clearly one of my first nights in the apprentice den, when the oldest apprentices were _this_ close to their ceremonies, and drunk on excitement and nerves and moonlight. Ripplepaw and I sat quietly for once, thrilled to be included. Thornpaw and Lilypaw were absent, out in the territory practicing night vision.

The conversation that far had been comprised mainly of Nettlepaw spewing opinions, Bramblepaw agreeing, and Hollypaw acting like she understood. Dapplepaw pretended she was asleep, but back then she'd had both eyes and no problem keeping one open. All of the conversations flew straight over my head, and I was close to joining Dapplepaw in half-sleep. Until, that is, Bramblepaw started talking.

"I really shouldn't tell, but I'm going to anyway," He had taken Hollypaw's dare to tell us his crush, something I would have refused, if she'd asked me. But I could see why he had chosen to tell- Nettlepaw had no problem hassling 'chickens', even if they were his brother.

We all leaned in close. Even Dapplepaw dropped her charade, opening both eyes and sitting up.

Silence reigned for several long moments before he spoke, so quietly I wondered if I misheard.

"Thornpaw."

Silence took hold again, lasting for several more moments, who seemed to stretch longer than their predecessors. Dapplepaw finally broke it, letting out a huff of air before dropping her head onto her paws, both eyes firmly closed. Hollypaw was next, purring so hard she shook.

"I'm sorry," she gasped, "I'm not making fun, it's just… Wow. Never, in a million moons, would I have guessed it."

Bramblepaw had purred along, and eventually everyone curled up to sleep. My last, confused glance at Ripplepaw was met with one of her "I'll explain later" looks.

Nettlepaw had been the only one not to react, and of course he was the one to break the unspoken rule and tell Thornpaw. Thornpaw, being himself, had said nothing to Bramblepaw and told Nettlepaw that if he was going to be a jerk, not to involve him in it.

But even now, badger-lengths away from all involved and seasons from the actual night, I feel a trill of second-hand embarrassment to think of what would have happened had it been anyone but Thornpelt.

So, I know not to trust cats not to get too chatty the second the sun's up, but I'm wondering if that problem will go away if there's no chance of me seeing the cat when during the day.

I change course abruptly, picking up a red rock and keeping my mind blank as I put it under the tree on the gathering plateau and head back to camp.

Do I want to talk? The better question is, will he listen?

**AN/ Well, it took bit longer than I thought, but still better than a month. Thanks for all the reviews last chap! You guys are crazy awesome. I feel like i'm forgetting something, so don't be afraid to ask questions if I did.**


	8. holy moly that's a lot of cat

I had to squint my eyes as I stepped out of the warriors den, into the ironically bright _sun_. Dawn patrols have never been my favorite, but it gave me an excuse to see if Pebbleheart left the red rock. Honeyear asked if I was ready to leave, quietly, as to not wake the other cats.

We made the long trek to the edge of Stormclan, pausing to hunt. A Honeyear and Foxgaze decigded that she should take her apprentice, Smokepaw, to the right, leaving Foxgaze and I to the left of the lake.

I trotted ahead and stopped, letting my scent that drives some she-cats crazy mark the territory. After what seemed like moons, we reached the area close to the meeting place I shared with my _friend_ Pebbleheart. She was clearly just a friend. Right? Shaking my head, I knew I was being ridiculous. She was from a different clan, and it was totally okay to have friends from the other clan, but...

I _had_ to see if the stone was there, but as soon as I stepped a paw in the water, I was caught.

"Suntail, what are you doing?" Foxgaze yowled to me. Of course, I panicked.

"J-Just getting a drink from the stream!" I yowled back and quickly took a sip from the lake. My eyes were still on the spot where the stone would be.

Foxgaze grumbled in the distance, but I didn't dare listen. But… _yes! It's there! The stone is there! _I stepped out of the chilled water and stretched in satisfaction.

"Want to be a part of Rainclan or something?" Foxgaze added sarcastically, nearly making me jump out of my fur, but all handsome cats have learned to keep their cool. But at the same time… he couldn't know, could he?

"Those fleabags? Never." I remarked coolly. Foxgaze nodded, but didn't drop the half- suspicious gaze.

"I suppose we should head back, at this pace, it will be sunhigh before we return,"

As much as I tried, I couldn't keep my mind off of Pebbleheart. The entire patol back to camp,while I pondered over her name.

_Pebbleheart? Heart of a pebble? Are they trying to convey the idea of her being strong, because although she's quite sarcastic and strong-willed, her name depicts otherwise. But… But what if a pebble is constantly hit with water, does she stay? If surrounded by the right things, this metaphorical pebble could overcome the harsh wind and relentless water. Am I the oppressor, or the friendly objects making her stand her ground? _

I shook my head. Pebbleheart is _just_ a friend, and the warrior code allows friends. I need to start focussing on my warrior duties and not some stubborn she-cat from Rainclan.

* * *

><p>Once Foxgaze and I reached camp again, it was nearly sun-high like the deputy predicted.<p>

"Why don't you go and make sure Honeyear made it back safely," the tom-cat murmured in my ear. I nodded, thinking he was caring about the well-being of two cats. Right before I raced off, I saw him grabbing a vole for himself.

I rolled my eyes. _Mouse-brain. _I looked around the camp, in the warrior's den, apprentice's den, the clearing, but the two cats were nowhere to be found.

Suddenly, a familiar smell washes over me. _Yes, they're safe. Honeyear and Smokepaw finally returned. _My joy didn't last long when I realized fear covered both of their bodies.

"B-Brightstar!" Honeyear cried out while Smokepaw whimpered. Immediately, Brightstar walked out with guilt and fear encasing her her eyes.

"What is it, Honeyear?" the leader spoke calmly in a low voice.

"Hawkheart… she's dead…" Honeyear whispered. All that you could hear besides two kits, blissfully ignorant, was the sound of silent disbelief.

"Are you sure? Where did you find her?" meowed Foxgaze, taking the initiative.

Taking a deep breath, Honeyear turned around and headed out the camp entrance, flicking her tail to summon others to come with her. I knew I had to help even though I was in desperate need of a vole and falling off my paws. I saw Swansong passing out herbs that were carried by warriors going along on the search.

"Hey, what're you doing?" I asked.

Once the initial shock left her eyes, she looked at me and responded "We don't know if whatever killed her is still out there, we have to stay prepared,"

"Oh, so who's going to help out in case of an emergency?"

"Poolripple asked me to go" she blinked some guilt and frustration out of her eyes "but I couldn't face Hawkheart if she really is dead," she sighed deeply and offered me some herbs as a way to end our conversation.

_I've never seen Swansong that upset, _I thought. _We haven't had a clan death in a while, maybe it's just getting to her. _I shrugged it off and stumbled after the rest of the cats.

* * *

><p>By the time we found Hawkheart's corpse and the elders had buried her, the sun had nearly set. Honeyear and Smokepaw had gone on a short hunting trip on their way back and gotten way off track, eventually stumbling upon Hawkheart's body. Everyone was on edge because nobody knew what happened. All we know is the stench of death was in the camp and now no one was hungry. I completely forgot my meeting with Pebbleheart until it was a little past moonhigh. I quickly stepped around my clanmates and walked out of our camp. I wanted to hurry so she didn't leave but I couldn't be loud, so I quickly strode through the moonlight. When I reached our designated plateau, I whispered her name.<p>

"Pebbleheart?"

"Hmph,"

_Yeah, that's her. _

"Hey, sorry I'm late, something crazy happened at camp today and it threw me off my schedule and..." I sighed heavily, finally realizing how much this whole ordeal had drained me.

Pebbleheart's ears twitched and she sat down, wrapping her sleek tail around her feet neatly. After blinking slowly, she meowed, "Tell me about it."

So, I told her the whole story of my day and immediately fell on my side to allow some air to enter my lungs.

Pebbleheart snickered for a second at my sheer clumsiness but put herself back together. "I'm sorry, Suntail. That must be rough."

Although her words could be taken as sarcastic, her eyes and tone were soft and sympathetic, and I liked that. I looked her in the eyes,wondering, _she's sorry? _"Mm. I'm sorry, too. You shouldn't have to deal with my issues,"

With a light smile, she nudged my chest with an unsheathed paw. "It's the least I can do," Her eyes blended well with the sky that night.

I thought, _it's so nice to have a friend.. a real friend. _I flipped back onto my paws "How's Rainclan?"

She flipped her ears back " Fine, I guess. Normal."

"What's normal like?" I asked, leaning a bit closer. She doesn't seem to realize I have next to no idea what goes on in Raincan, but I would be interested to know.

"Everyone asking me things, questions I don't want to answer. It seems like I've been under a ton of scrutiny since…" her voice trails off.

"Since what?" she seems a bit uncomfortable, and I wonder if I should stop. My own curiosity pushes me on, though, so I fix my eyes on her.

She tilts away, and I wonder if I've made the wrong choice.

"Since my sister died. everyone thinks they need to be careful around me."

That gives me pause. Suddenly, I understand her **glum** mood. Swansong and I might not be close anymore, but if I lost her…

"I'm sorry. was it recent…?"

"No, it was-" she whispers, I even think I see her shudder a bit. "You were there. It was at the fox hunt."

I sway a little, hanging on each word. I flick my tail back and forth and i feel uneasiness and dread climbing up my spine. To regain my posture, I shake my head a few times and lick some of my fur. "I was there? Are you sure?"

"Positive," she says, focussing on a very interesting leaf.

A flood of memories come swarming back and suddenly I'm drowning, drowning in the memories of being pushed, of red fur, of fierce growls and the cries of other cats. _Surely that isn't her sister, _I think to myself _Other cats didn't survive that.. right?_

"I'm very sorry.." I meow, barely audible. "You can talk about it if you want to,"

"Talk about it?" She meows, her voice colder than normal. "You did this, Suntail."

"I don't know what you're talking about," I whisper.

Her eyes flash and suddenly we're nose to nose, "You do! I know you do!" she sounds like she's in desperate need for something, but I'm completely oblivious to what that is.

She knows, and she knows I know, too. I can't hide it anymore, but I'm at a loss for words. "What was her name?"

"Ripplebreeze."

"Pebbleheart.."

She moves away when I get closer, "You took her away, Suntail. You took her, and now I'm alone," She's barely audiable, but it hits me with such a force, it's like she's yelling.

My claws are digging into the moist ground and everything is spinning. "Pebbleheart, I promise you i didn't mean to. I was just a kit back then, and I'm so sorry. I wish i could change it,"

"Me too," Her back is to me.

For minutes, we sit there in silence and it's beyond painful. I can't make a move because I'm too busy watching her fur prick each time I inhale. My mind wanders back to that night and I'm facing a fox, I'm facing death head-on. Suddenly, I feel like running towards Pebbleheart. I need her warmth. I need her sneers and I need her snotty remarks. I need to be engulfed in her watery eyes like it's a hot day and her eyes are the cool lake.

Desperate to do to comfort her and make sure I'm still grounded, I lick her shoulder comfortably, and to my delight, she doesn't flinch.

"I didn't mean it," she mews quietly, and lays down in exhaustion at my feet. A small purr rumbles in my throat and next thing I know, our pelts are intermingling once again. "I didn't mean it," she mews again. We fall asleep next to each other, but there is something different about us together. This time, we're sleeping together, not just next to each other; everything is in sync, our breathing, our dreaming, our minds. We are silent but i can hear her now on a completely different level. We are one.

AN/ well, that took us... a while. I wish you guys could see the mess our doc went through. it involved: yard sards, avril lavigne's sk8er boi, and pebbleheart as maggie stiefvater's joseph kavinsky.

it was a wild ride, but unplanned hiatus is over for a while. expect a new chap sometime tomorrow.


	9. holy shi tzu

I wake up curled into Suntail's side. It's warm, and for a moment I consider just burrowing

deeper into his fur. But then memories of everything I said last night come back to me.

Those thoughts have been swirling in my head for a while, but I'd never meant to speak them, especially not to him. He obviously forgives me, considering he fell asleep wrapped around me, but I know I need to apologize. The idea has me feeling like I'm going to choke.

This is all his fault, but I can't face him. Then I'd have to face how disgusting this whole mess is making me feel instead of just pushing it aside and moving on with my life.

I should wake him up, make sure he returns to stormclan in time, but if I did he'd probably want to talk and thats the last thing I want to do. Instead, I step away from him and start back towards Rainclan with my mind on nothing at all.

The thing that drives me out of my daze, snaps my vision into focus is a scent that's not quite familiar. Not badger, not fox, definitely not another cat. Suddenly anxious, I unsheathe my claws.

I'd been letting my muscles guide me, barely paying attention to my surroundings, but now I allow my nose to pull me along the scent's trail. It carries me towards the ravine, to a low-lying area where water tends to pool after heavy rains. The sky's nearly entirely black, only a scrap of moon and a smattering of stars lighting my way. I don't see the small hole in the ground until my paw lands in it and I go stumbling.

I stand back up and shake myself off. Normally I'd be storming away now, muttering angry words and placing my paws more carefully, but something stops me. The scent is thick in the air here, fresher.

I look at the hole, even though I practically have to press my muzzle into it to see anything. It looks like a pawprint, left when the mud was slightly wetter. A huge pawprint, with claws that left deep scars in the dirt in patterns of four.

Suddenly, the name of the only creature that could leave this type of tracks flashes into my mind: _Dog._

I turn tail and sprint back to camp.

Relatively safe, in my nest between river-smoothed boulders, my heart still races.

I need to tell someone. That thing's paws are nearly the size of my face, it's obviously a danger to the clan! I should be in Mother's den now, helping organize a patrol.

The thing that's holding me back is the inevitable question: _What were you doing all the way out there so late at night, Pebbleheart? _Most cats know I tend to wander at night, but not nearly that far. Not to mention that Lilystorm would say this proves I need to stay in camp, smothered by rocks and trees and other cats.

So I do the cowardly thing: I lay down, pretend to sleep, and wait for morning. I'll leave early to hunt, and dash back to ask for more cats to investigate. Presumably, after they see it too we'll all come back and Mother will tell us how to get rid of the beast.

When dawn finally rouses itself, I'm the first one out of camp. I take the journey out to the gorge at a quick walk- I have no reason to run in the eyes of those at camp, but I'd be stupid to waste time. When I arrive at the spot I tripped over last night, I see that the sun has started to dry out the mud further, leaving the print I saw and several others more easily visible. I quickly tase the air- The scent is still there, but staler.

I do allow myself to run back to camp, leaving tall grass and low-hanging leaves swaying in my wake. I call up all the sudden fear that had seized me last night, and let it show in my face as I fly into camp.

I weave through the sleepy cats who lay on the shaded ground, still waking up. I must not have been gone long at all.

"Silverthorn," I ask the deputy, "Where's Icestar?"

Silverthorn herself looks half-asleep, and startled that I've intercepted her on her way to where she'd delegate patrols. She's the type of cat that, given time, could wear a rut in the ground.

"She had to go see to something. What do you need?"

Perfect. The one time I actually seek her out… "I saw- Well, mainly smelled- something odd out in the territory. I want to take a patrol to look at it."

Silverthorn sighs, her grass-green eyes flicking over the cats gathered behind me.

"Take Bramblestorm and Thornpelt. Send someone back if you end up needing reinforcements."

The tone of her voice makes it clear she doubts whatever I'm worried about will be worth reinforcements. I force back a growl as I nudge Thornpelt. My clan's deputy thinks I'm unreliable. She expects me to be making something out of nothing. That's fine. That's _great._

I wait until we're well out of earshot to explain anything to either of the toms. To their everlasting credit, neither asks.

"I smelled something weird and saw pawprints. _Huge _pawprints. I'm worried it might be a dog, but I've never encountered one to be sure."

Thornpelt flicks his ears- he's not that much older than I am- but Bramblestorm slows a bit, like he's thinking.

"I think I'd know. it's been a long time, but I'm sure I'd know dog smell if I smelled it. "

"Good."

We're quiet for the rest of the walk to the edge of the gorge. The sun is out, not even a single cloud trying to leap in front of it. The heat is making a valiant effort to siphon off some of the moisture hung in the air, but it's also making me too sweaty to tell the difference.

Just before we reach where the pawprints start, Bramblestorm stops. "That. That is definitely a dog."

"I was hoping you were going to say it was my imagination." Relief, of all things, worms its way into my head. Now, if someone is attacked, it's not my fault for keeping a secret. And while that shouldn't be any type of consolation, it allows my pulse to fall back to normal levels for the first time since yesterday evening.

"Let's just go back to camp and tell Icestar- That is, if she'll be gracing the camp with her presence."

Bramblestorm ends up leading the way, moving quickly but not quite running. Thornpelt actually lags behind, his head turning and tilting every time the wind changes. I'm about to tell him to hurry up when he stops completely.

"I may be imagining things, but it seems like I can smell fresher dog scent coming from that way."

Thornpelt gestures with his tail. Uneasily, I open my mouth and turn to taste the air. I see Bramblestorm doing the same out of the corner of my eye.

And, because we're the luckiest cats in either clan, the air tastes overpoweringly of sweat and dirt and something that can only be described as _dog. _Not just fresh- from this distance, it smells like the dog could have left the area minutes ago.

"Foxdung. Do you think we should follow it?"

Without thinking about it, Thornpelt and I have both turned to Bramblestorm. He may not be the wisest cat in the clan, but he is the most senior warrior at our disposal, if only by a few moons.

"Let's follow it for a bit. At the first sight of anything, though, we're running."

Now Thornpelt turns to me. "Someone knows where to look for our bodies, right?"

I snort, because considering that that may become a real concern would make it a lot harder to keep walking. "Silverthorn, if she counts. "

Oddly enough, that doesn't seem to reassure him.

AN/ whats this? did i,,, did I actually publish something when I said I would?

i can see you guys reading this, you know, so reviews would be appreciated. i used to ask for long reviews with constructive criticism but i literally don't care anymore. any opinion you have on any part of this, feel free to leave in that nice little box.


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